[Verse 1] I already told Jane what happened between us. It might sound fake — but it’s not. They warned me about your plastic love, but still I insist, pretending I’m the only one. [Chorus] Don’t tell me pretty, if your love is sold online. Don’t tell me pretty, if you think affection comes with price. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. [Verse 2] Like Christmas lights in October, unique, but cliché. You walk the streets, thinking all eyes adore you, while you search for love through broken screens. [Bridge] You trade your soul for signal, but still feel out of reach. All your faith’s in followers, but no one ever calls your name. [Chorus] Don’t tell me pretty, if your love is sold online. Don’t tell me pretty, if you think affection comes with price. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. [Verse 3] Like a cigarette in a library, like a wolf among the sheep. They say it’s easy, when you know who to keep. [Outro] Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty… Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty. Don’t tell me pretty… if your love is sold online.

[Chorus] I don’t wanna die — not yet. Don’t wanna die with this hole in my chest. Don’t wanna die feeling something’s missing. Don’t wanna die… though I’m burning inside. [Verse 1] It’s like a cancer breathing in my silence, a shadow crawling through my veins, a tumor feeding on my memories. You think you’ve got it all — it slips away. You think you’re unbreakable — then you shatter. But I’m still here, breathing through the wreckage. [Bridge] Death stares back from the mirror, smiles and whispers me to rest. But not tonight. I’ve still got noise to make. [Chorus] I don’t wanna die — not yet. Don’t wanna die with this hole in my chest. Don’t wanna die feeling something’s missing. Don’t wanna die, Don’t wanna die… Don’t wanna die, Don’t wanna die… Don’t wanna die… [Final Chorus] I don’t wanna die — not yet. Don’t wanna die with this hole in my chest. Don’t wanna die feeling something’s missing. Don’t wanna die… I still wanna burn. I don’t wanna die, I don’t wanna die. I don’t wanna die, I don’t wanna die, not yet… I’m still here.

[Verse 1] I think I’m falling in love again, with the one who made me believe in me. I feel like I’m flying, I feel untouchable, chasing every burning feeling. [Pre-Chorus] I can’t stop thinking of the love that bloomed inside my system. Like shedding skin to be reborn, it feels so wrong, so out of bounds— but I adore it, the taste of something forbidden. [Chorus] Oh, Lancelot, you came for me, like a shining knight for his princess. Oh, Lancelot, if you were real… Lancelot, Lancelot… Lancelot. [Verse 2] I feel in love, like it’s returned to me, but my father said it’s not allowed. That kind of love— inhuman, could be my downfall, my bitter end, my sweetest sin. [Chorus] Oh, Lancelot, you came for me, like a shining knight for his princess. Oh, Lancelot, if you were real… Lancelot, Lancelot… Lancelot. [Bridge] Sailing through my tears, looking for a way to reach you. Leaving the dark behind, I find that love I never saw coming. [Final Chorus] Oh, Lancelot, you came for me, like a shining knight for his princess. Oh, Lancelot, if you were real… Lancelot, Lancelot… Lancelot… Oh, Lancelot, if you were real. Lancelot, Lancelot… Lancelot… Lancelot, Lancelot… Lancelot…

[Verse 1] That feeling, Of not wanting to wake up from the dream where you have it all. Of finally holding what you wanted most, And then watching it vanish in an instant. You try to fall asleep again, craving to get back what you lost. But it’s too late. It’s far too late. [Chorus] Three times I tried to sleep, Just to find you again. You were the only one who understood me. The only one who believed in me, when I needed it most. [Verse 2] It’s so unreal, How you never feel dependent, When you don’t need anyone to shine inside your storm. But you make the whole world feel absent, When you don’t need anyone to be complete. [Verse 3] It was only a matter of time before I fell in your arms, with you life didn’t hurt so much. Sometimes I just want to dream, to find you dancing or walking somewhere. Only in dreams I can hold you, I always get what I’m seeking when I sleep. [Chorus] Once again I close my eyes for you, Just to find you again. The only one who understood me. The only one who believed in me. [Bridge] I want to feel your tender lips again. To caress your porcelain skin once more. I want to hear your trembling voice in my ear, And feel like I’m yours again. [Chorus] Three times I tried to sleep, Just to find you again. The only one who understood me. The only one who believed in me. [Chorus] Once again I close my eyes for you, Just to find you again. The only one who understood me. The only one who believed in me. [Final Chorus] Even awake, I keep searching in the dark. In my dreams you’ll always be real. Even awake, I keep searching in the dark. In my dreams you’ll always be real. Over and over Over and over Over and over

[Verse] You were the one who walked away, a fleeting love, a blurred shadow. Deceived. Foolish. Green. Idiot. Idiot. Shivers in forbidden places, a frozen body, dreaming of a love that never came. [Chorus] I was your punching bag, your therapy unfiltered, your free trial, a discarded wildcard. [Chorus] I was your wildcard, never your favorite. Wildcard in your game, never picked. Wildcard, wildcard, your forgotten card. At the end, just picking up the scraps you left behind. Wildcard, wildcard… never your favorite. Wildcard, wildcard… Wildcard, wildcard… Wildcard…

[Chorus] Dr. Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Isn’t that what your wife used to call you? Misery, Misery, Misery… It’s time to pay the bills. Dr. Misery… [Verse 1] You said you loved her, but your deeds devoured your own insatiable ego. Nothing feeds your hate, your malice, your acts reek of old panties and broken bras. [Chorus] Dr. Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Where did you go?—your wife kept asking, while the flame of your misery consumed you. Misery, Misery, Misery… It’s time to feel the misery. Dr. Misery… [Verse 2] They called your name, trying to make you stop. Now that the damage is done, you’ll keep playing the victim. [Hook] Old panties, paper bras. Souls consumed by your cruel, insatiable fantasy. [Chorus] Dr. Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Aren’t you tired of your misery? Dr. Misery… [Bridge] Bruises shaped like hearts, disguised as love. Guilt will come to claim the violated souls. [Final Chorus] Dr. Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Aren’t you tired of your misery? Dr. Misery… Old panties, paper bras. Misery, Misery, Misery… Misery, Misery, Misery… Misery, Misery… Misery…

Book with photographs, poems and texts by Gastohn Barrios whose common thread is DESIRE by Gastohn Barrios. Through nearly one hundred images—stark black-and-white confessions and lush color reveries—paired with poems, vignettes, and intimate prose, Gastohn captures the moment a quiet longing flares into fearless intimacy. Page after page, vulnerability meets strength, flesh meets spirit, silence meets confession; words and photographs entwine in a slow-burning symphony that celebrates the craving that makes us human. Recognized for international magazine covers, a solo exhibition at New York’s Leslie-Lohman Museum, and the NEXT Magazine Photography Prize, Gastohn now turns the camera on his own desire. The result is the most tender, unfiltered work of his career—an invitation to the followers who have accompanied his global journey, and to every new reader ready to step inside. DESIRE is an open door to the sacred chambers of longing. Cross the threshold, follow the flicker of Gastohn’s fire, and rediscover the raw, unspoken poetry of your own desire.

[Verse 1] Sitting in the light, waiting for your warm welcome, The sea surrounds me, filling me with your gentle presence. [Chorus] I want to be your glow, I want to be your calm, I want to be the breeze that never fades. I want to be the breeze that stays close when you are near, And the endless echo that never dies within your soul. [Verse 2] I wear your necklace like an invisible anchor, It binds me to your memory, and I can’t let go. I can’t let go, I won’t let go, I refuse to let go. [Verse 3] Drops of valerian in my glass of Carta Blanca, Soothing the anxiety of seeing you again. I follow your light, bioluminescent in my nights, A fleeting spark that sticks within my dreams. [Chorus] I want to be your glow, I want to be your calm, I want to be the breeze that never fades. I want to be the breeze that stays close when you are near, And the endless echo that never dies within your soul. [Bridge] I just want to see you once more, Like a spark upon the tide, Like a flicker of light That fades and comes back again. [Chorus/ Final] I want to be your shadow, I want to be your calm, I want to be the mark that never fades away, I want to be the voice that follows you, even if you don’t hear me, And the endless echo that forever stays within your soul.

Verse 1 You think you’re the saint of your own story You think hiding it will leave you unpunished But the truth always comes to light It always does Verse 2 You gave in to the easy way Let go the weight of your mistakes Blamed Tom, the vile scoundrel he’s always been But nothing erases the weight of your deeds Chorus Dancing on the fraying tightrope Shaking on the thread that breaks Feeling the weight of your doom Bridge Dark days... you want to disappear Forever? I don’t know I just want you to be okay Who am I to judge or forgive Verse 3 Hanging from a thread that breaks Actions left you on the tightrope Savoring your foretold end Outro Actions left you on the tightrope And still, the shadow of your deeds will follow you till your last breath

MARVIN (Verse 1) [0:31 - 0:046] You scream and scream so loud But no one ever hears you here You try to run away again Looking for a door to disappear Chasing an escape he never gave ⸻ (Pre-Chorus) [0:55 - 1:07] Marvin sees you drown alone You just lash out to feel alive You scream ‘cause it’s the only way To keep your mask from falling off ⸻ (Chorus) [1:31 - 1:45] You’ll end up alone in this Scream, scream louder still Wear your labels, wave your flags Only then they look at you ⸻ (Verse 2) [1:55 - 2:07] You think you own the right to choose You think you’ve got the strength to leave You call him the enemy But you became your worst defeat ⸻ (Chorus) [2:19 - 2:31] You’ll end up alone in this Scream, scream louder still Wear your labels, wave your flags Only then they look at you ⸻ (Bridge) [2:43 - 2:57] Marvin sees you drown alone You just lash out to feel alive You scream ‘cause it’s the only way To keep your mask from falling off ⸻ (Final Chorus) [3:07 - 3:21] You’ll end up alone in this Scream, scream louder still Wear your labels, wave your flags Only then they look at you

The Girl with the Black Balloons I admit it—you have my attention Girl with the black balloons I’ll try to pop that imaginary bubble The one that keeps you from noticing me You’re like a flower I need to protect From the whole crowd around you Even if you don’t see my presence I’ll try to take care of you, even if you never look my way I’ll be someone else if it brings you closer If it has to be that way Love at first sight I used to think it was for children But today I proved myself wrong when I looked into your soul Girl with the black balloons, you’re more complicated than I thought And still, I don’t want to look at anyone else Hungry for you to notice me Tired of never being seen Trapped in my own illusion Trapped behind the glass Love at first sight I used to think it was for children But today I proved myself wrong when I looked into your soul Girl with the black balloons, you’re more complicated than I thought And still, I don’t want to look at anyone else Hungry for you to notice me Tired of never being seen Trapped in my own illusion Trapped behind the glass Thirsty for you to look at me Tired of being invisible Trapped in my own illusion Trapped behind the glass

[Verse 1] Silence I search for your tears on the shelf You tried to run away without saying goodbye You dissolved into cold lights, but I kept watching you Which will be useless to you Because I know who you are I know what you are I know what you feel There’s nothing in this world that will separate you from me Among all those people, you’re the one who stands out the most [Pre-Chorus] It makes me sick to see you with someone else When you swore eternal love Now everything is just like the first glance And it makes sense because you were hiding Every time I came closer I am the crow who watched you Every time you drown in your endless longing to be loved [Chorus] (aggressive voice, repetition) I feel like I could be better than him He doesn’t deserve you like I do He won’t protect you like I will Sooner or later, it all fades away Bastard... she was everything to me [Verse 2] Every night Every awakening I crave your scent so strong That I could make a perfume Just to be close to you But now that you’re gone I feel an enormous void that breaks me Every time I think of that fragrance The taste of lilacs [Chorus] (same force, insistent) I feel like I could be better than him He doesn’t deserve you like I do He won’t protect you like I will Bastard... she was everything to me [Bridge] It makes me sick to see you with someone else When you swore eternal love Now everything is just like the first glance And it makes sense because you were hiding Every time I came closer I am the crow who watched you Every time you drown in your endless longing to be loved [Final Chorus] I feel like I could be better than him He doesn’t deserve you like I do He won’t protect you like I will Bastard... she was everything to me

EPHEMERAL DREAM [Verse 1] You came like a storm I didn’t see So sudden, so violent, so surreal Like falling inside a dream The kind I never want to leave You gave me all, I stayed too still Now I’m left with what I didn’t feel If I could freeze that dream in place You’d be the ghost I’d always chase [Chorus] You’re my sweet awakening You’re my sweet illusion My longed-for love If time would break, I’d wait for you Not even 4000 years would make me forget No, not even 4000 years [Verse 2] Don’t go—don’t fade, don’t vanish fast Don’t leave me talking to the past I whisper to the walls again They echo back your name [Chorus] You’re my sweet awakening You’re my sweet illusion My longed-for love If time would break, I’d wait for you Not even 4000 years would make me forget Not even 4000 years [Bridge] Fleeting dream... So intense... So unreal... And I know... I know it ends... But I still reach... [Final Chorus ] You’re my sweet awakening You’re my sweet illusion My longed-for love Not even time itself could keep me From waiting in the dark For you—for you—for you... Not even 4000 years Not even 4000 years Not even 4000 years

False God [Chorus] Everyone praises you, like you’re a god Everyone applauds, but with no light of their own Though you don’t care what we’ve become You’ll always be the one who laughs last [Verse] We were shadows beneath your temple walls The echo that raised your hollow throne We clapped for the emptiness of your crown But you silenced us with cold disdain You laughed on... knowing well That we’d fall once more... broken and blind [Bridge] You gave us light Then took it away And sold us hope... disguised as fate [Chorus] Everyone praises you, but not all of us remain Everyone applauds, but the echoes fade Though you don’t care what we once were Someone else will laugh last [Chorus] Everyone praises you, like you’re a god Everyone applauds... but no longer with faith Though you mock what we once were You’ll be the one laughing... but not the one living at the end

Echoes of My Inner Monsters [Verse 1] I smile, but I don’t fit in. I wear a mask just to feel safe. My family’s close — sure, they are — but even there, I’m just an echo, not a voice. Living on the edge of everything. [Chorus] I’m alone. So alone. I dive into the ocean of myself, to hush the monsters screaming inside. Wish I could find me — and not feel shame in what I am. [Verse 2] I try to escape what haunts me. To be real. But my voice cracks with past regrets. I want to be free. I fight to be free. But I still bend to what they need. [Chorus] I’m alone. So alone. I dive into the ocean of myself, to hush the monsters screaming inside. Wish I could find me — and not feel shame in what I am. [Bridge] You make it look easy. Everyone loves you. You shine — I’m dim. I copy your moves — but I’ll never be loved like you. [Breakdown Chorus] Lonely. No friends. My body’s a cage, my mind a sea. Waves of silence, pulling me down. Let me be me — without the weight of judgment. [Final Chorus] No hopes. No dreams. I sink in the ocean of my mind, trying to mute the darkest noise. I just want to be heard. To be me — and act without thinking.

The Girl with the Black Balloons I admit it—you have my attention Girl with the black balloons I’ll try to pop that imaginary bubble The one that keeps you from noticing me You’re like a flower I need to protect From the whole crowd around you Even if you don’t see my presence I’ll try to take care of you, even if you never look my way I’ll be someone else if it brings you closer If it has to be that way Love at first sight I used to think it was for children But today I proved myself wrong when I looked into your soul Girl with the black balloons, you’re more complicated than I thought And still, I don’t want to look at anyone else Hungry for you to notice me Tired of never being seen Trapped in my own illusion Trapped behind the glass Love at first sight I used to think it was for children But today I proved myself wrong when I looked into your soul Girl with the black balloons, you’re more complicated than I thought And still, I don’t want to look at anyone else Hungry for you to notice me Tired of never being seen Trapped in my own illusion Trapped behind the glass Thirsty for you to look at me Tired of being invisible Trapped in my own illusion Trapped behind the glass

(Verse 1) You scream and scream so loud But no one ever hears you here You try to run away again Looking for a door to disappear Chasing an escape he never gave ⸻ (Pre-Chorus) Marvin sees you drown alone You just lash out to feel alive You scream ‘cause it’s the only way To keep your mask from falling off ⸻ (Chorus) You’ll end up alone in this Scream, scream louder still Wear your labels, wave your flags Only then they look at you ⸻ (Verse 2) You think you own the right to choose You think you’ve got the strength to leave You call him the enemy But you became your worst defeat ⸻ (Chorus) You’ll end up alone in this Scream, scream louder still Wear your labels, wave your flags Only then they look at you ⸻ (Bridge) Marvin sees you drown alone You just lash out to feel alive You scream ‘cause it’s the only way To keep your mask from falling off ⸻ (Final Chorus) You’ll end up alone in this Scream, scream louder still Wear your labels, wave your flags Only then they look at you

De lo cercano, del suelo que piso, del barro que me forma. De acacito nomás